Reflection

Reflection

Part I-
Why I Chose What I Chose

You may have noticed me on our field trips. I was the one lugging around the ten pound laptop instead of the cute little journal. It’s the way my mind works….five words forward and two words back, eight words forward and four words back….and an eraser just isn’t as efficient as the backspace key. Each word that I type is revised again and again as I go. The method is tedious, but usually by the time I’m done writing, the piece is close to being in its final form. Any changes that are made after the process is complete are typically major changes, like a whole section that I decide to leave out, or sometimes I decide to go in a completely different direction than I had originally intended.

The first piece of writing that I included in my portfolio is a found poem entitled “The History of Jackson McGee and Allison Dupree.” I wrote this poem during our field trip to downtown Greenville. We learned how to create a found poem from Rebecca Kaminski’s demonstration. For me this has been a great strategy for writing poetry. Writing a great poem usually requires about eight hours of my free time, hence I have only ever written two or three great poems in my life, with none in between. The fact that this strategy has enabled me to write a poem in a matter of thirty minutes or less speaks for the ingeniousness of it. This poem was inspired by two main types of media. One was a poster in the window of the Sticky Fingers restaurant that beckoned to those who passed by, “Do you know your blue’s name?” It was a candy store of words, which I quickly jotted down. The second source for my inspiration came from a previous field trip to downtown Greenville that I took with my students in the spring. There was the ubiquitous couple making out…on the bridge, in the park, on the rocks, sitting on the bench. I took pictures, with my zoom lens, just so people would believe me. Together, the image of the couple combined with the words from the poster became the poem about Jackson McGee and Allison Dupree.

The second piece in my portfolio is my first attempt at professional writing. It’s an article that I wrote entitled, “Riveting Rubric Writing.” One of the most influential classes that I have ever taken was on assessments. It revolutionized my philosophy on grading. I made changes in my teaching practices that encouraged students and promoted success in my classroom. Ever since that class, assessment is something that I feel strongly about, which is why I chose it as the subject of my professional piece. I learned quickly after posting my article on e-anthology that other people also have strong feelings about assessment. I received a lot of useful feedback which I used to refine my rubric and my article, and also some not so useful feedback that I ignored.

The third sample in my portfolio is a memoir entitled “Discovering Greatness.” I began writing this piece during Jamie’s demo on biographies. It’s one of my favorite pieces that I have ever written. I’m not sure why. I guess it’s just being in a place that I can look back at the awkward years, and I’m finally old enough to be able to laugh at them. Growing up on Sixteen Candles, Pretty in Pink, and Summer Sisters, the whole coming of age theme greatly appeals to me as a writer.

The final piece in my portfolio, which was also the first one I wrote during this course is a kind of stream of consciousness/ commentary entitled, “The Nutshell in a Crazy.” I wrote it just after attending the Katy Wood Ray conference. Because it was written back in May, you will have to click on “older posts” at the bottom of my blog to access it. I like this one for several reasons. It does not appear to be the most refined, which appeals natural desire to ignore rules yet not get into trouble…after all it is my blog and my commentary. As I wrote this piece, my thoughts were influenced by Katy Wood Ray, and my writing style by Anne Lamott. This is just reaffirming that I was not wasting my time in this class. Finally, I asked one of my coworkers to view my blog, and he took up my comment space responding with his own little commentary. I enjoyed the bantering, and was proud to have written a piece that would evoke such emotion in someone.

Part II
What I Revised and Why

My first piece of writing did not undergo any major revisions after the write/ rewrite/ rewrite/ rewrite/ rewrite process that I go through with everything I write. Also, in staying true to the Found Poem Rules, besides rearranging words, there was only so much that I could revise. There was one part in the poem that I kept changing around:

with washboard ribs,
sugar lips
and seven white teeth,
killer legs
and gumbo hips
freshly squeezed into perfection

I wanted washboard ribs to come after the line before, which used the word “skinny.” I knew I wanted lips and teeth to follow, but then I was torn between which should come first, legs or hips. In one of my earlier drafts I opted for the hips to come first because I liked the way the end rhyme sounded when it was close together; however, being a pear shaped woman with hips that are three sizes larger than my upper body, I wanted the hips to be freshly squeezed into perfection, rather than the legs. I decided to sacrifice the sound for the imagery. All of the changes that I made to this poem were a matter of personal preference.

To tell you the truth, I was amazed that anyone on e-anthology even responded to my “Riveting Rubric Writing,” which has changed names three times. I received some of the most opinionated responses of all to this piece. Some people really loved it, and others politely disliked it. Whether people liked it or didn’t like it, they both did a fine job of offering useful criticism. Madalyn felt that I had an imperialistic tone towards rural culture. Seeing as how I did not want to offend anyone in my first paragraph, I deleted the following lines:


When I say rural, I mean cows grazing in fields where there could be shopping malls, and kids watchin’ dog fights and chicken fights instead of cable TV. Our school serves students from all over the county.

Patricia reminded me that I didn’t mention what grade level I taught, so I added that into my final draft. She also said that I should shorten the article. While I agreed with Patricia, I also agreed with Tom who thought I needed to add student voices, which I took to mean samples. In response to this, I removed the following lines which did more to express my voice more than content:

Just as we (the posters and I) were about to leave the classroom, they screamed, “The book, don’t leave the book!” I walked over to my desk and picked up the nearly forgotten 6 + 1 Traits of Writing text, leaving behind a sad and vulnerable looking rectangle that would not longer be protected from dust. But we couldn’t sit around feeling sorry for the desk. We had work to do (see Writing Rubric).

Tom’s feedback led me to add some samples from Joseph’s essay to demonstrate how the rubric addressed specific issues in his writing. After reposting my article and changing the title I only received two responses. Madalyn read my article again and loved it, but Allison apparently doesn’t like rubrics. Although she didn’t actually say this, she suggested that I research the history of rubrics and include this in my writing. I personally think she may have been trying to ensure that no one ever read my article by encouraging me to make it as boring as possible; however, she did make a good point about how I addressed conventions in my rubric. It originally implied that students should only write in standard American English, which completely ignores the fact that dialect and slang are important and necessary at times, depending on the purpose and audience. This led me to revise that section of my rubric.

I’m not sure what I was thinking when I began writing “Discovering Greatness.” In the beginning it was about my struggle to be a “submissive” wife, and it talked a good bit about why I, therefore, hate Sunday school. In my memoir I hinted around about how being brought in a matriarchal home causes me to rebel against the idea of submission. My writing group suggested that I go into more details about what it was like in my family. This led me to write about the time my mom had a double mastectomy. It was such an obvious display of self-determination. And then somehow the whole rest of the story was about my life long search for this great and hidden talent that I believed I had. I finished the story late one night and read it aloud to my husband. He laughed hysterically until I got to the part about Sunday school, and then he just sat there and stared at me, and then he went to bed. I loved that part of my memoir. And there I was, faced with the same issue of submission. He said he thought it made it seem like I hated God, and I should take it out. In the end I took it out because it just didn’t fit with the rest of the piece. I posted it on e-anthology, and once again got useful feedback. Claire and Mike both thought that the part about my mom’s surgery took away from the rest of the story, so I took that part out too. Mike also said that he liked the ending, but he thought that I needed to add a little more to help set up the ending. He gave me a couple of examples. Conclusions are always the most difficult part for me, so his advice and examples were really helpful. I added in the following lines just before the end:

But it wasn’t until my sophomore year that I found my true passion, one that would lead me on a journey of self discovery, like a mirror to Narcissus, allowing me to be center stage. All I had to do was write the play.

The last piece of my portfolio, and the first piece that I wrote in my blog, “The Nutshell in a Crazy,” was in response to my recent exposure to commentary during the Katy Wood Ray conference. I had never written commentary before. It turns out that commentary goes quite well with my sarcastic and opinionated nature. I was also in the middle of reading Bird by Bird, by Anne Lamott, one of my favorite writers. In the book Anne says that sometimes she’ll call up her wittiest friend and discuss whatever topic she is writing about, and then she pulls from what they say and uses it in her writing. Now while this seems like cheating, I happen to have an incredibly witty friend, so I called her and read my blog entry to her. For the record, I did tell her that I was going to steal her material for my writing, after all, the book I was reading said to do so. As I was reading, she praised me for having gone online and created a blog and declared that I was now part of the Matrix….stole it. When I got to the part about my parents’ rotary phone, she empathetically said, “Laurie, you’re like Nell”…..stole it too. For some reason, when I went back in and added those parts it got me going again, and I ended up adding the part about my senior citizens’ discount at Wendy’s.

Part III
What I’ve Learned From Other Writers

Cathy’s short story “The Scream,” is one of my favorites. I like the way it starts out in the middle of a dream. It’s a great hook because the reader isn’t quite sure what is going on, but the dream comes back in the end. One of the best things about this story is how she slowly reveals what the husband is all about. The disgust builds as you read, beginning with bad breath, then taking the History of WWII book into the bathroom, on to nose picking, and finally the great reveal of his affair. By the time he dies, you’re right there with her, rooting her on, excited that her dream has come true.

Angela K’s “Flatulent Free” is another favorite. I like it first of all for its content…..which isn’t because I love to read about farting. It has the same appeal to me that Bridget Jones does. It’s all about something embarrassing that happens to all of us, and it just makes me feel better to hear about it happening to someone else. The story begins in an elevator, and seamlessly transitions into a childhood flashback. Angela also has great words like descent, potent, malicious, flatulence, accolade, expunged, and stench.

Robbin’s “Strangers in the Night” is another favorite. I like it because it’s short and simple and witty. The ending took me completely by surprise.

I admire Natalia’s boldness. She might write what I'm thinking, but would never say. Although hanging out with Natalia and reading her writing does not help me in my ongoing struggle to “submit,” it does make me want to drink and cuss, which is much more fun.